malinfuckjohanna

You have to stop the Q-Tip when there's resistance.

Rachel: Wha... married?
Ross: Well, yeah, I think we should get married!
Rachel: What? Because that's your answer to everything?

Rachel: ...How many centimeters am I dilated? Eight? Nine?
Dr Long: Three.
Ross: Just three? I'm dilated three!

Ross: Chandler entered a Vanilla Ice look-alike contest and *won*!
Chandler: Ross came fourth and cried!

Monica: You don't like the game, because you suck at it.
Chandler: I don't suck at it. It sucks. And you suck.

Phoebe: Oh, my God! The foster puppets!

Ross: What are you doing tonight?
Chandler: Why, do you have a lecture?
Ross: No.
Chandler: Free as a bird, what's up?

Mike Hanigan: You're not gonna try and make me join a cult are you?
Ross: No...
Mike Hanigan: Oh okay. You just have that look.
Ross: [to himself] Damn SuperCuts!

Joey: Why do you have to break up with her? Be a man. Just stop calling.

Joey: Pheebs, you wanna help?
Phoebe: Oh, I wish I could, but I really don't want to.

And i thought this day couldn't get any better.

M